"every line is plotted and designed to leave you standing on your bedroom window ledge"

do you know what it feels like to be alive? to have every fibre of your being stretching and straining and working towards a certain goal? do you really know what it means to be alive? i wish i could say that i do, but you've made sure that i don't. that without you i'm just an empty shell without hope, without meaning, without breath. i can't sleep unless i can hear your steady breathing, i can't sing unless i see your face, i can't smile unless you smile at me. i'm streatched across my bed without thought and feeling and i'm waiting for sleep. do you know what it means when i tell you i can't sleep? it means i need you. it means i want you to hold me. it means i love you. but you never understand so i'm sleepless and smile-less. i'm empty without you. and i can't fucking take it any longer.